Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Annoying Newsroom Quote of the Day

"Why is my Farmville crashing?"

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Annoying newsroom comment of the day

In television news, a "tease" is a short story right before a commercial break that tells you what's coming up without giving away the story. In a sense it's the most important story of the show, because it is meant to keep people past the break when they want to flip the channel. Despite this, many writers think they're a nuisance and save them until last and rush through them. I love writing teases because it presents a unique creative challenge: sell a story without telling it. CBS Sunday morning can do this with just two or three words written to match the video. I'm no Chas Osgood, so I require a few more words. That being said, my assignment is to write a tease for a story that's important, but depressing, and is filled with video of a burned up Afghan woman. I couldn't even watch the story. So how the hell do I write a tease that makes you want to a) watch this depressing horror story, b) stick around for another 15 minutes to see the story, c) not gross out international audiences and d) not trivialize it? Why do we want to tease it in the first place? I get this note from the producer regarding the video to be used in said tease:

I CUED TO WHERE IT'S NOT SO DISTURBING...
ALSO JUST MINDFUL OF THE TZ... SINCE IT'S A DISTURBING STORY, AND VO

Jeez, thanks I was gonna make it a laugh riot.
My point is not that we shouldn't run the story, its very important.
My point is, don't tease it at all. Show some discretion.

Here's the tease I eventually wrote, I opted for quick and generic rather than specific and disgusting.

AND DESPERATION IN AFGHANISTAN LEADS TO DRASTIC MEASURES FOR SOME WOMEN.
YOU'LL SEE EFFORTS TO END THE CYCLE OF ABUSE.

Would I stick around to watch that? Maybe. But had I written something about "disturbing video from Afghanistan's abusive husbands.." I would definitely change the channel.

Writing about car wrecks, apartment fires and gas main breaks was so much easier.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving

1. What do you most look forward to about Thanksgiving week?
This year I have to work, so really not much, maybe less traffic. But I have much to be thankful for in general.
2. How many people do you plan to have around the Thanksgiving dinner table this year?
Just the 4 Welchs.
3. What Thanksgiving food do you most look forward to?
Dressing and Green Bean Casserole.
4. Which Thanksgiving food do you avoid?
Pumpkin Pie, cranberry sauce and sweet potatoes. I'll eat the marshmallows, though.
5. Take the quiz: What Fall Spice Are You?



You Are Nutmeg



You are a harmonious and peaceful person. You are surprisingly adaptable and flexible.

You are a typical girl or guy next door, but you also have a undying thirst for the exotic.



You dream of tropical places, and you have a true appreciation for far away flavors.

You are easygoing enough to enjoy a full day on the beach. "Island time" sounds like the perfect time for you.



6. What aroma most reminds you of fall?
Thanksgiving dinner being cooked.

I'm not feeling creative today. Sorry. You can get a refund at the ticket office.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Annoying Newsroom Quote Of The Day

"I don't have a TV at home, but..."

Really? REALLY? You work in TV but don't have a TV? I guess that's like a gay gynecologist.

Tuesday, November 02, 2010

Annoying Newsroom Quote of the Day

"Hello? Hello? HELLO? HELLAW? YEAH, SOME KEEDZ MUST BE CALLIN ME ON YO PHONE! hello?"
Newsroom cleaning guy yelling into his phone 5 feet from where the sports guy is anchoring a show.