Monday Music Mambo

1. What's your favorite movie about music? Purple Rain. What else is there? Spinal Tap is a far 2nd.

2. What's your favorite music concert video? Sign 'O' The Times. In 1987 I bought the video with my first paycheck. :) I still have the video. Its worn the hell out. I now have a semi-bootleg DVD of the movie, which will have to do until Prince gets off his ass and makes a really nice DVD of it.

3. What do you pay more attention to in a song: the music or the lyrics? Oooh, good question. It depends on the music. If its dance pop shit, then neither. If its rap, I listen to the beat and the words, giving neither much credit. I think it should be a 50-50 deal. Some people have great lyrics and shitty music, and vice versa. I like that Elton John realized early on that he wasn't a brilliant lyricist, but that he was a great pianist. I'm sure that's played a huge part in his success. Or maybe it was that Donald Duck outfit.

4. Here's a serious question involving a touchy situation. You've won a backstage pass to meet your favorite band! You go there after the show, very excited to meet everyone. When you arrive, you see some of the band members doing something illegal (drugs, weapons, etc.). After you've greeted the band, had them sign autographs, etc., do you tell anyone what you saw? Or do you keep quiet because you're sure they do this kind of thing all the time and it's no big deal? Tell everyone. While I'm not that naive as to think that bands are role models... I do believe that you should know the people you're looking up to. And if I saw a performer doing coke or meth or something, thats a personal flaw, regardless if he or she is a great musician. That doesn't give you a pass to be a druggie. Would Hendrix, the Sex Pistols, Motley Crue or the Doors been as good as they were without drugs? I don't know, but as a person in real life, you're known by the company you keep. I wouldn't hang out with a drug addict, regardless if he plays a mean guitar.

February Abby Video

Question of the Day

1. Name five famous Georges

1. George Washington
   
2. George W. Bush
   
3. George Clooney
   
4. George Jefferson
   
5. George Jetson

2. How many one-dollar bills do you have in your wallet/purse right now? 3

3. Ever been to Washington, D.C.? How about Washington State? Tell us a little about your trip to either of those places. And if you haven't been to either place, tell me what Washington, D.C. monument, institution or tourist attraction you most want to see if you ever go there. I went to DC when I was a high school senior. It was very interesting. At the time I didn't appreciate it as much as I would if would go now. I was more interested in the fun things and the chicks in the group rather than the educational benefits. Like when A.J. Soprano went to DC and he told Tony all he did was play Playstation 2 in the hotel. :) There are a few things I remember about DC: I had an appointment to meet both a Senator and a Rep from Louisiana. Both were in Louisiana while I was in Washington, so I got a tour of their stupid offices. How exciting. And I remember the Jefferson Memorial because the tour guide/counselor explained that the phrase "Peeping Tom" came from the memorial because the statue looks into the White House bedroom. I also remember the Iwo Jima Memorial, because the tour guide/counselor said there was one extra hand pushing the flag up, and that was to represent the hand of God. And also I went to the Israeli embassy, and knew nothing about Israel, but felt compelled to ask the guy (who may or may not have been someone important, he just had a thick accent) if Israel had nuclear weapons. He looked at me and said, "If we did I wouldn't tell you." L'chayim, asshole. I also went to the Lincoln Memorial, and the tour guide/counselor said there was one word misspelled, and we should try and find it. We never did.

I've never been to Washington State, and have no desire to go there. It probably smells like teen spirit. Eeeew.


1. A song by a Beatle "In My Life"
2. A song featuring piano as the main instrument "Piano Man" Billy Joel duh
3. A song with a woman's name in the title "Michelle" The Beatles
Sont les mots qui vont trés bien ensemble
4. A song with a man's name in the title "Real Slim Shady" Eminem
5. A song about money "Money" by Pink Floyd, "Money For Nothing" by Dire Straits
6. A song with weather in the title "Purple Rain" Prince, "Here Comes The Sun" The Beatles, "Raindrops Keep Fallin' On My Head" BJ Thomas.
7. A song with parentheses in the title. "Something In The Water (Does Not Compute)" Prince
8. A song made by a punk band "God Save The Queen" The Sex Pistols
9. A song with the word "song" in the title "Your Song" Elton John
10. A song you love so much you stop and listen whenever you hear it.
Hmmm... too many. I can't pick just one.

My message to those asswipes who are rioting and murdering because of that cartoon of Muhammed: LIGHTEN UP.

Monday Music Mambo

David Bowie or David Lee Roth? Bowie. David Lee Roth is a so-so singer. He's more of a personality. David Bowie is a music legend with talent beyond just singing and acting goofy.
Hotel Calfornia or Heartbreak Hotel? Hard one... Both are classics. California is like the #1 classic rock radio tune of all time, but Heartbreak is one of the genre's earliest hits. I'd say just because of the complexity and various layers, Hotel California is better. Maybe its the warm smell of colitas talking.
KISS or Love? Kiss. I never heard of a band called "Love." I know Courtney Love, and she's scarier than 4 middle age guys in clown makeup.
Jimi Hendrix or Jimmy Page? Hendrix. though the two are neck-and-neck, I'd say even Page would agree with me. Jimi re-defined playing electric guitar. Very few can come close to him on the guitar. Page is one of them, though.
Faith Hill or Faith No More? Faith No More, simply because they rock, and Faith Hill is a girly country singer.
Safety Dance or The Hustle? Eeew neither.
George Clinton or George Strait? No competition, Clinton. One guy sings about an Atomic Dog, the other sings about a dog under the porch. Besides, you think George Strait would wear a diaper on stage, and name one of his albums, "Hey Man, Smell My Finger."
Elvis Presley or Elvis Costello? Presley, he's the King. Costello is overrated.
Little Richard or Lil' Jon? Lil Jon, cuz I don't think he'd take one up the ass.
Steven Tyler or Mick Jagger? A tie. Both are awesome singers and showmen. Tyler my have a little more vocal skill than Mick, but Mick has the experience of helping define rock over the last four decades.
Keith Richards or Joe Perry? Another tie. Neither is better than the other. Both are skillful and have done some of Rock's most classic anthems. However Keith may have a slight edge because of his age and experience.
Live album or studio album? Its apples and oranges. Both have their merits, and both have their downfalls. I think they're different animals. Studio Albums sound better but Live albums have an energy that you don't get playing in a studio doing multiple takes. On the other hand its those multiple takes that make things sound great. Plus on a live album you can really see someone's skill as a musician. In the studio, you don't know if its studio tricks thats making something sound like it does.
Fender or Gibson? I don't play, so I really can't tell. I think its mostly the player and not the instrument. Hendrix playing a $20 box from Sears would sound better than me playing an original Les Paul. So there ya go.

Chas & Abby

Behold The CW!!!

I'm getting my own network!
I would have picked ChasTV as the name, but "The CW" works just as well. I promise to have reality shows that barely resemble reality... I promise to have black sitcoms that exagerrate stereotypes... I promise to take beautiful 30-somethings and make them pretend like they're teenagers to give real teenagers' self-esteem an abortion kick to the gut. All this plus a third rate newscast made up of stories you don't give a shit about, told by people who don't know shit about them.
Now for a catchy slogan...
"The CW... one letter away from 'The Cow'"
"You'll see double when you watch the CW"
"The CW... no it don't stand for country and western or The Crack Whore."
"Must 'C W' TV"
"The station that plays the 'Mama's Family' Reruns."
"The CW... hating Ryan Seacrest since 2006"
"You're money back if we suck."
"We've merged the WB & UPN.. can you say 'Nice package'?"
"WWJW?..The CW!" (What Would Jesus Watch?)
"Is Fonzie Busy?"

What do you think? Hit Comments and release your inner Van Der Beek.

Speaking of TV... NBC has cancelled one of my favorite shows, The West Wing. It jumped the shark about 2 seasons ago, when the original creators left the show. Oh well, the reruns still rule!

1. Name three songs that have the word "rain" or "water" in the title. To make it harder, I'll do 3 of each.

1. Purple Rain - Prince(how obvious)
2. Mandolin Rain - Bruce Hornsby
3. Rain - The Beatles

1. Waterfalls - TLC
2. Something In The Water (Does Not Compute) - Prince
3. Bridge Over Troubled Water - Simon & Garfunkel

2. Ever been to a concert where it was raining? If not, is there a band or festival that you would want to see even if it meant standing in the rain? Yeah, Kiss & Aerosmith once and Jimmy Buffett. Both times were at the Ampitheatre Formerly Known As Lakewood. I'd stand in the rain for Prince, and thats about it.
3. You're a movie producer, and you need a soundtrack for a weather scene. Pick songs that you think would fit with the following pieces of action:

a) Clouds coming in - Clubbed To Death (Kurayamino Mix) - Rob D. Its dark and ominous, but it moves.
b) Rain starts to fall, wind starts to blow - Metallica - One. The song starts slow and builds to a crescendo, much like a rain storm.
c) Sun finally comes along and makes everything better again - Here Comes The Sun - The Beatles (kinda obvious) Starts out quiet and ends on a happy note, like when the sun comes out.

1. Before I walk out the door, I always check to make sure I have my wallet phone and keys.
2. I can't seem to catch up on my _______. Bills
3. The one surface in my house that always seems to get cluttered fast is _______. Desk
4. If I sleep past _____, I feel that I've slept in too late. Sheeit... you can never sleep too late.
5. No matter how hard I try, I just can't seem to _______. be satisfied.
6. I hope to have my income taxes done by _______. One day after I get my w2s.
7. This year I'd like to make more time for _______. putting cornrows in Willie the Homeless Wino's nappy hair.

Stayin' Alive... barely

The real reason Cheney's had foot problems... too much disco.

The Revolution Has Begun

"You're going to be trapped in an elevator with seven comedians for three hours. Choose seven famous laugh-makers, living or dead, that you'd most like to spend time with when they were in their prime."

1. Chris Rock The funniest stand-up for years. His movies aren't all that funny, but as far as standing on a stage making people laugh, he's the man. Even from his early days on SNL and his cameo in I'm Gonna Get You Sucka you could see he knew he was funny as fuck.
   Embarrassing Stumble: Down To Earth. A dead Chris embodies an old rich white guy. Cliches run amok.
   
2. Dave Chappell This guy is scary funny. His stand up is funny, and his show is funny as hell. Rick James, Lil Jon both owe the resurgence to him and his making fun of them.
   Embarrassing Stumble: The token black buddy in You've Got Mail. 'Nuff Said.
   
3. Early 80s Eddie Murphy Back in the day, his act was so funny and so dirty, that as a young kid it blew my mind. Listening to him talk about The Honeymooners, his uncle at the barbecue, and taking a dump was groundbreakingly funny. "Raw" is a comedy classic, and a very accurate title of a comedy concert movie. Now he's turned into a family-movie star. He went from Mr. Robinson's Neighborhood to Mr. Rogers Neighborhood. He went from talking dirty to talking with animals. He went from talking about nuts to being the Nutty Professor.
   Embarrassing Stumble: Anything after 1990, including that video he made with Michael Jackson. Tito bring me a tissue.
   
4. Early 90s Andrew Dice Clay When he did his first HBO special about 1988, and brought his Dirty Nursery Rhymes to the world... it was mind-blowing. Nobody talked like him. Then after about a year, his schtick got old.
   Embarrassing Stumble: He tried to be the caring dad on a CBS sitcom. Lasted about 10 minutes. Imagine that.
   
5. Rodney Dangerfield One of the originals. One of the first guys to have a catch phrase. "I don't get no respect." He made funny movies as well. Watch "Caddyshack" and "Back to school" and then tell me he's not the king of the one-liner!
   Embarrassing Stumble: Lady Bugs. Coach Rodney turns a kid into a cross-dresser so a girls soccer team can win. How heartwarming.
   
6. Dennis Miller His intelligent wit mixed with a good old-fashioned funny joke gave him his own niche. His rants are peppered with pop culture and obscure references that make you feel like you're a genius if you pick up on it.

   In the elaborate wardrobe of human emotions, guilt is the itchy wool turtleneck that's three sized too small. Guilt may be difficult to articulate, but when it surfaces, it's as unwelcome and distinct as Jethro Bodine in the lobby of an Ian Shraeger hotel.

   Do you know who Jethro and Ian are?
   Embarrassing Stumble: Became a Conservative
   
7. Artie Lange He's a fat Italian guy who likes to curse and crack wise. I can't imagine why he'd be one of my favorite comedians. :) He's the everyman comedian. You'd think he was just the guy who sits next to you on the bus or that works down the hall from you, until you realize he's the funniest mufuka on the planet. He also has the best beginning to a story: "Ya ever been high on heroin and shit your pants?"
   Embarrassing Stumble: Played the token fat buddy in The Bachelor the Chris O'Donnell movie where he has to marry Renee Zellwegger to inherit some money.
   

In general, I usually hate stand-up comics. How many different jokes can you make about the president, flying, hotel rooms, and socks in the dryer? I also think that people seek out the spotlight and feel the need to make people laugh because of something in their childhood. Mommy didn't give them enough attention or they had overly strict parents. Wah. The funny thing is, most comedians will incorporate that into their act.

---

Would you rather:
1. get a prank phone call at 2:00am OR sit on a whoopie cushion on a public bus? Get a prank call... I like a good prank call. As for the whoopie cushion on a bus, who gives a shit.
2. get poked in the eye OR get a wedgie?
The wedgie, cuz you can pull out a wedgie. You can't unpoke your eye!
3. taken to the hospital because of a freak accident involving a llama and whipped cream OR an allergic reaction on your nipples from latex?
The nipples one. I could make up a story about why latex was on them. I don't think I could lie about my llamasexual experiences.
4. get bit by a rabid chihuahua OR a wild badger?
Badger? Badger? We don't need no stinking Badger!

1. Something that bothered you last week. Bills.
2. Something that made you smile Every minute I spend with Abby
3. Something that made you sad. Going to work.
4. Something that made you angry Useless Reporterettes whose personal problems become my problems.
5. Something that made you happy 1-9-05 Stern Uncensored!
I finally got my Sirius radio hooked up. I haven't listened to many of the stations beyond the Stern Channel and the classic rock one. Just being able to listening to Howard on the long commute to work is worth the price of admission. The other 100+ channels are a bonus. Not to mention its an alternative to the shitty Atlanta stations.

"Rusty Cage" by Johnny Cash is one of the best songs ever.


Can you guess what this is a picture of? Hit comments and release your inner Jethro Bodine.

All is Quiet On New Year's Day...

1. From a financial standpoint, was 2005 a good year or a bad year for you? Do you expect 2006 to be better or worse?
Bad, very bad. See #2 for why...

2. What was your least favorite moment of 2005? February 25, 2005. I had a baby on the way, a house being built, and I got fired... the other worse moment (among many) was riding to Children's Healthcare of Atlanta with my 3 month old daughter in an ambulance.

3. Did you lose anyone close to you in 2005? If so, who were they? No, thank God.

4. Take this quiz (if you haven't already!): What do you know about blogging?

Well, You Know What a Blog Is...

You got 3/8 correct! But, truthfully, most blogs probably bore you.

How Much Do You Know About Blogging?

I really don't give a shit.

5. Where were you when 2005 began? Where were you when 2005 ended? I was in a shitty apartment with a pregnant Tina... As the year ends, I'm in my own home, with Tina and my little angel, Abby.

6. Did you make new year's resolutions for 2005? If so, how many did you keep? No resolutions, if you want to do something, just do it. Don't wait for the beginning of the year. Does the change of the calendar year really give you more willpower? Do you know of anyone who has had a resolution that's stuck?

---

I know its been a while since I've posted anything, but I've been busy with work and the holidays. This year is now over, and I've got nothing but good thoughts for 2006!

Logical?

"At night, when all the world's asleep, the questions run so deep for such a simple man. Won't you please, please tell me what we've learned I know it sounds absurd but please tell me who I am."

Chas By Dali

Salvador Dali Salvador Dali should paint your portrait. You love to think about the world in a different way then everyone else. You are very ambitious, and you like strange things. You are curious about everything and love to learn. Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

This is funny because Dali is my favorite artist. Who is yours? Hit comments and release your inner Van Gogh.

---

I haven't been to the movies in months, but I've been twice in the last few weeks. Here's my reviews:
Walk The Line. I liked it. The life story of Johnny Cash. I'm a big fan of the man in black, and I liked seeing his story. I was a little disappointed in Joaquin Phoenix. He had Cash's on-stage moves down, but when he was off the stage, he was just Joaquin Phoenix with a country accent. I do respect that he and Legally Blonde sang their own songs. And the movie glossed over much of his life. For example, they never mentioned his resurgence in the 1990s. This guy had hits in 4 different decades. How many performers can say that? Very few. And they spent too much on his drug addiction. Sure he was a pill-popper, but is that what defined him? But overall, it was an entertaining movie. It wasn't as good as Ray.
I also saw Rent, It was good. I enjoyed the music, and the stage production. Abby didn't like it though. Her review: "Whats with all the queers?"
What about you? Seen any good flicks lately? Hit comments and release your inner Ebert.

Christmas 2005 At Chas's House

monday madness

1. When is the last time you moved?
8 months ago when I moved into the new house.
2. How many times in your life have you moved?
At least 20. I have never lived anywhere for more than 5 years.
3. In your opinion, what is the worst thing about moving?
EVERYTHING! I hate it. The boxes, the lifting, the illegal day laborers you have to find on side of the road to move your shit.
4. What is the most exciting thing about moving?
Having a clean slate to start with.
5. If you've lived in the same place all your life, do you plan to move in the future?
I actually like the fact that I've lived in many different places. I've seen lots of different things, met a lot of different people. I know many many people who have lived in the same place their whole lives... and they think the world ends at the city limits. Broaden your horizons.
6. Do you WANT to move somewhere else; if so, where
New York, DC or LA. But who knows if I could afford it!

BeliBlog: Four For Friday Archives

Q1 - Holiday: Thanksgiving in the United States is traditionally celebrated with a large meal shared among family and friends. In both Canada and the U.S., it's an important family gathering, with many people often choosing to travel long distances to be with loved ones for the celebration. What did you do on Thanksgiving Day, and, what was on the menu for the big meal? I ate alone at Golden Corral... thinking how much the day sucked... about crowds... about closure.. about choices.
Q2 - Religion: I keep seeing this bumper sticker that reads, 'Jesus Is The Answer!' What do you think the question is? Fill in the blank: _____ H. Christ.
Q3 - Innovation: What's one invention that would dramatically change your life for the better? A Crystal Ball.
Q4 - Shopping: Black Friday, the day after Thanksgiving in the United States, is historically one of the busiest retail shopping days of the year. How much of your holiday shopping do you get done on Black Friday? How much do you save for what could be considered 'last minute'?" Aw Hell no. I've been shopping on black friday once or twice. No bargain is worth fighting the unwashed masses.
1. Favorite brand of jeans: Levis.
2. Magazine you read regularly: FHM
3. If a button came off your clothing, could you sew it back on? Like I know how to do that!
4. Have you ever had a curfew? When I was a lil boy, my mom told me I could set my own curfew, but I had to stick to it. That worked out fine. It was rarely ever past 2am... I'll take sleep over beer anytime.
5. Most dangerous thing you've done: Every day you face dangers. I could spill some bleach in my Fruity Pebbles... I could get hit on the way to work... I could trip and stuck a screwdriver in an outlet. People do dangerous things on purpose because they're missing something, and that fills a void.
1. Is it approaching winter where you live? Its colder than a witch's tit in the ATL.
2. What season do you like the best? Summer. I like it hotter than a whore in church.
3. What is your favorite thing to do to relax in the upcoming winter/summer? Chase Abby.
1. What, in your opinion, is the most important invention in history? The computer and TV, its a tie.
2. What future invention would you like to see fully functional in your lifetime? Space Tourism for non-millionaires
3. If you could go back in time to witness one event from history, which would you choose? The moon landing.
4. If you could witness one imminent event in the future, what would it be? First Contact with the Vulcans
5. If you had to be any person in history, who would you want to have been? Nobody! Whoever you is, be dat.

I seem to have left my wit and sense of humor in my other pants.

My 2 Favorite TV Lines

From Sanford & Son:
Julio: Buenos Noches, Mr. Sanford.
Fred: Beans and Nachos to you too.


From WKRP:
Mr. Carlson: As God as my witness, I thought Turkeys could fly.

Hurt.

I hurt myself today To see if I still feel I focus on the pain The only thing that's real The needle tears a hold The old familiar sting Try to kill it all away But I remember everything What have I become My sweetest friend Everyone I know goes away In the end And you could have it all My empire of dirt I will let you down I will make you hurt I wear this crown of thorns Upon my liar's chair Full of broken thoughts I cannot repair Beneath the stains of time The feelings disappear You are someone else I am still right here What have I become My sweetest friend Everyone I know goes away In the end And you could have it all My empire of dirt I will let you down I will make you hurt If I could start again A million miles away I would keep myself I would find a way

I knew it!

Kevin Federline: Musical Genius

I have to say K-Fed's new single is sure to set your heart on fire. Bubba can do it all. He raps, he reproduces, he wears hats. Check out his mad lines...

My favorite story of the day...

Hot lezbo cheerleaders busted for making sweet sweet love in a terlet stall. And here I thought that was only in the movies. No word if it ended like the Skinemax movie with the cop patting down the girls with his "night stick."