God dammit

I miss you so goddamn much. I hurt I cry I repeat. When will this end. You are my world my everything my beginning my end. I want to exist in your world. I don't. I know it's selfish of me to want you to do something you don't feel. I want to do whatever the fuck it takes. I am your slave. I will be the one that takes your abuse, I will be the one that gives you 100% of himself. I will be door that you need to slam. I will be whatever you want. I will be whatever you need. I will be yours to do with what you want. The woman who dumped me after one date, now she wants to go shopping and hang out. I want to tell her my heart belongs to someone else, even though you don't want me.  You could go to the ends of the earth and not find someone who loves as much as I do.  I can't do this. It's killing me from the inside. I doubt you'll ever see this, because why the fuck would you care? I write this in secret, because I know if I show you my true feelings at best you will ignore them. At worst you will turn them in comedy material for you and your friends to laugh at. I'm a joke to you. A pathetic joke. The sad part is, I am to myself too.