Those spinning rims are so 2002! You need a digital display on your rims. Forget the spinners: pimp rims go high-tech. I think they're incredibly tacky, but damn if they aren't neat to look at. Maybe if a company was to provide me with the rims, I'd advertise their wares. How cool would it be to have your rims sport a digital viagra logo or an ad for the new Vince Vaughn movie, "I'm a 38 Year Old man child, but I'll change my ways for this hot piece of ass." Co-starring one of the Wilson brothers and at least one cast member from Anchorman. But I digress...
I think as long as people keep making their cars look like Mardi Gras floats, someone will create something tacky to put on it. What happened to the days when you could just slap some rims on a mini truck and put some of those double-windshield-wipers and some AutoZone stickers on the side and call it pimped?
On all those "Pimp My Ride" shows, not once have you seen them put the most practical innovation in a car: a toilet. How cool would it be to hit a button on the steering wheel, and the bottom of the seat opens up, to reveal a toilet? You could put a toilet paper holder on the center console, and a some Purell to sanitize your hands afterwards. Then when you flush, the poo and pee is converted to fuel, which saves you gas money. Then automatically, your choice of 3 refreshing scents are sprayed into the car: Cherry, New Car, or Vanilla. You could theoretically eat a big breakfast that included some high-fiber cereal, and drive from LA to New York without stopping to refuel or use the bathroom. Just bring along some granola to keep the "fuel flowing."
Why am I the only one to think of these things?
What would be your dream upgrade if your car got pimped? Hit comments and release your inner Xzibit.
