Attention Whores

They annoy me. So your mommy didn't pay you enough attention, so now I gotta placate you? It's not even just people I know, though in my bidness there are A LOT. The inspiration for this rant was some numbnut I saw walking into work as I was walking out. They guy was wearing tighter than tight biking shorts and shirt, bright yellow. Then the guy had a bike helmet with a rear-view mirror attached to it, with some big sunglasses. We get it, you ride a bike. Then the douche had the nerve to cinch his bike, not to the bike rack like everyone else, but to a pole 6 inches away from the rack. While I have absolutely nothing against people who ride their bikes to work, I think that's great, fewer cars on the road, this bitch is too much. He's probably the CEO of the company and would love nothing more than to cut me loose like Lance Armstrong's missing nut. Smug bastard probably loves the smell of his own farts and looks down on the rest of us for not being as green as him and his tour de farce outfit.
This is what goes through my head when it's too early to go home and go to bed, and too late to have more coffee.

A ribcage!

I slept on an old dog bed stuffed with wigs! I watched a prostitute stab a clown! Our basketball hoop was a ribcage! Some guy with dreads electrocuted my fish! I’ve seen a blind guy bite a police horse! A puppy committed suicide after he saw our bathroom! I once bit into a burrito and there was a child’s shoe in it! I’ve seen a hooker eat a tire! A pack of wild dogs took over and successfully ran a Wendy’s! The sewer people stole my skateboard! The projects I lived in were named after Zachary Taylor, generally considered to be one of the worst presidents of all time! I once saw a baby give another baby a tattoo! They were very drunk!

Shame Shame Shame

I've been writing stories about this oil leak in the Gulf for 35 days now. That's about 34.5 days too many. Every day there's something worse than the day before.
It's easy to say BP is to blame and they screwed up royally... they did. And it's easy to say the government displayed Bush-like ineffectiveness in dealing with the disaster... they did. But my concern isn't who did what... it's who is doing what right now. The U.S. has access to the greatest fucking minds in the world, and we're waiting on BP to come up with brilliant ideas. The best they can do is "shove cement, golf balls, and tires in it." Why are we trusting them to fix something when they're the ones that made the fucking mess in the first place?
Louisiana seems to the center of the universe when it comes to natural disasters that are magnified by human error. Five years after Katrina, things seemed to have come full circle. The Saints won the Super Bowl giving the region a much-needed shot of excitement after years of bad news. Then this happened. I can only hope the rest of the world realizes that New Orleans isn't on the Gulf and that its still the vibrant city it's always been. Oil, tourism, and fishing all have this symbiotic relationship that keeps the state afloat. When tragedy strikes one, the others suffer. I don't have the answer, and I don't think anyone has a perfect solution, but there needs to be a John Wayne dude to come in and get something done, instead of watching BP, the Coast Guard and the Government sit and bicker like junior high girls.
Like Smiley says...

Sleep. Rest. A Jedi craves not these things.

It's week two of my vampirical existence. So far no major problems, besides being tired and prone to nap at any moment. I'm working the 10p-8a shift at work. Who did I piss off to get that shitty shift? Well, I asked for it. The way I see it the benefits outweigh the problems. My 10-hour shifts give me a 4-day work week, with Weekends and Friday's off. Ya can't beat that. Plus I get a bump in pay, and I'm home for dinner every night. Before I was working nights and weekends, and had to get up at 6am, after working until 1am just to see my kids before they're off to school/babysitter. Then I would have to cram a week's worth of activities with them into the few hours before I had to work on the weekends. My breaking point with that schedule was when I had to request vacation time for my daughter's birthday party and dance recital, then hope no one else had that time off. I know nobody cares about my work schedule, but I've been up for about 23 hours now and I need to do something to get me through the next hour. My Dad sacrificed by standing on his feet 6 days a week running restaurants to make sure we had nice things. I think a little sleep deprivation is the least I can do.