Logical?

"At night, when all the world's asleep, the questions run so deep for such a simple man. Won't you please, please tell me what we've learned I know it sounds absurd but please tell me who I am."

Chas By Dali

Salvador Dali Salvador Dali should paint your portrait. You love to think about the world in a different way then everyone else. You are very ambitious, and you like strange things. You are curious about everything and love to learn. Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

This is funny because Dali is my favorite artist. Who is yours? Hit comments and release your inner Van Gogh.

---

I haven't been to the movies in months, but I've been twice in the last few weeks. Here's my reviews:
Walk The Line. I liked it. The life story of Johnny Cash. I'm a big fan of the man in black, and I liked seeing his story. I was a little disappointed in Joaquin Phoenix. He had Cash's on-stage moves down, but when he was off the stage, he was just Joaquin Phoenix with a country accent. I do respect that he and Legally Blonde sang their own songs. And the movie glossed over much of his life. For example, they never mentioned his resurgence in the 1990s. This guy had hits in 4 different decades. How many performers can say that? Very few. And they spent too much on his drug addiction. Sure he was a pill-popper, but is that what defined him? But overall, it was an entertaining movie. It wasn't as good as Ray.
I also saw Rent, It was good. I enjoyed the music, and the stage production. Abby didn't like it though. Her review: "Whats with all the queers?"
What about you? Seen any good flicks lately? Hit comments and release your inner Ebert.

Christmas 2005 At Chas's House

monday madness

1. When is the last time you moved?
8 months ago when I moved into the new house.
2. How many times in your life have you moved?
At least 20. I have never lived anywhere for more than 5 years.
3. In your opinion, what is the worst thing about moving?
EVERYTHING! I hate it. The boxes, the lifting, the illegal day laborers you have to find on side of the road to move your shit.
4. What is the most exciting thing about moving?
Having a clean slate to start with.
5. If you've lived in the same place all your life, do you plan to move in the future?
I actually like the fact that I've lived in many different places. I've seen lots of different things, met a lot of different people. I know many many people who have lived in the same place their whole lives... and they think the world ends at the city limits. Broaden your horizons.
6. Do you WANT to move somewhere else; if so, where
New York, DC or LA. But who knows if I could afford it!

BeliBlog: Four For Friday Archives

Q1 - Holiday: Thanksgiving in the United States is traditionally celebrated with a large meal shared among family and friends. In both Canada and the U.S., it's an important family gathering, with many people often choosing to travel long distances to be with loved ones for the celebration. What did you do on Thanksgiving Day, and, what was on the menu for the big meal? I ate alone at Golden Corral... thinking how much the day sucked... about crowds... about closure.. about choices.
Q2 - Religion: I keep seeing this bumper sticker that reads, 'Jesus Is The Answer!' What do you think the question is? Fill in the blank: _____ H. Christ.
Q3 - Innovation: What's one invention that would dramatically change your life for the better? A Crystal Ball.
Q4 - Shopping: Black Friday, the day after Thanksgiving in the United States, is historically one of the busiest retail shopping days of the year. How much of your holiday shopping do you get done on Black Friday? How much do you save for what could be considered 'last minute'?" Aw Hell no. I've been shopping on black friday once or twice. No bargain is worth fighting the unwashed masses.
1. Favorite brand of jeans: Levis.
2. Magazine you read regularly: FHM
3. If a button came off your clothing, could you sew it back on? Like I know how to do that!
4. Have you ever had a curfew? When I was a lil boy, my mom told me I could set my own curfew, but I had to stick to it. That worked out fine. It was rarely ever past 2am... I'll take sleep over beer anytime.
5. Most dangerous thing you've done: Every day you face dangers. I could spill some bleach in my Fruity Pebbles... I could get hit on the way to work... I could trip and stuck a screwdriver in an outlet. People do dangerous things on purpose because they're missing something, and that fills a void.
1. Is it approaching winter where you live? Its colder than a witch's tit in the ATL.
2. What season do you like the best? Summer. I like it hotter than a whore in church.
3. What is your favorite thing to do to relax in the upcoming winter/summer? Chase Abby.
1. What, in your opinion, is the most important invention in history? The computer and TV, its a tie.
2. What future invention would you like to see fully functional in your lifetime? Space Tourism for non-millionaires
3. If you could go back in time to witness one event from history, which would you choose? The moon landing.
4. If you could witness one imminent event in the future, what would it be? First Contact with the Vulcans
5. If you had to be any person in history, who would you want to have been? Nobody! Whoever you is, be dat.

I seem to have left my wit and sense of humor in my other pants.

My 2 Favorite TV Lines

From Sanford & Son:
Julio: Buenos Noches, Mr. Sanford.
Fred: Beans and Nachos to you too.


From WKRP:
Mr. Carlson: As God as my witness, I thought Turkeys could fly.

Hurt.

I hurt myself today To see if I still feel I focus on the pain The only thing that's real The needle tears a hold The old familiar sting Try to kill it all away But I remember everything What have I become My sweetest friend Everyone I know goes away In the end And you could have it all My empire of dirt I will let you down I will make you hurt I wear this crown of thorns Upon my liar's chair Full of broken thoughts I cannot repair Beneath the stains of time The feelings disappear You are someone else I am still right here What have I become My sweetest friend Everyone I know goes away In the end And you could have it all My empire of dirt I will let you down I will make you hurt If I could start again A million miles away I would keep myself I would find a way

I knew it!

Kevin Federline: Musical Genius

I have to say K-Fed's new single is sure to set your heart on fire. Bubba can do it all. He raps, he reproduces, he wears hats. Check out his mad lines...

My favorite story of the day...

Hot lezbo cheerleaders busted for making sweet sweet love in a terlet stall. And here I thought that was only in the movies. No word if it ended like the Skinemax movie with the cop patting down the girls with his "night stick."

Brown Got Railroaded? Not likely.

I know its a little late to still be bitching about Hurricane Katrina, but this really pisses me off. Anyone who says that FEMA's response was the best they could do given the information they have is dead wrong. Marty Bahamonde, a FEMA official testified before a Senate committee earlier this month. And he says he was in the thick of it, in the Superdome, with people dying and shitting in hallways and starving to death. Luckily he had his blackberry that was amazingly still working. He sent the word out soon as the situation got bad. He was met with a polite thank you or nothing at all. He did, however, get a directive from FEMA director Michael Brown's press secretary, Sharon Worthy, regarding His Holiness's eating schedule. From
USATODAY.com:

"Worthy wrote that 'it is very important that time is allowed for Mr. Brown to eat dinner' in Baton Rouge. She went on to express concern that Brown should be allotted plenty of time in his schedule because 'restaurants are getting busy.'

Bahamonde, who received a copy of the e-mail at the time, wrote a reply that said, 'OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!', according to an e-mail transcript. 'Just tell her that I just ate an MRE and (went to the bathroom) in the hallway of the Superdome along with 30,000 other close friends so I understand her concern about busy restaurants.' "

Michael Brown should be held personally responsible for the deaths along the Gulf Coast. I know that one man can't save everyone's life, but his job was to manage federal emergencies. Isn't that what FEMA stands for? Of course part of the blame rests on the shoulders of N.O. Mayor Ray "Come help or I'll curse" Nagin, or LA Governor/Deer-In-Headlights Kathleen Blanco. They knew the city was one storm away from devastation, but did they get everyone ready? Part of the blame also goes to the residents of New Orleans who stayed. Poor, homeless or whatever, you have to do what you can to survive. It has nothing to do with money. And finally, the blame also goes to Hurricane Katrina, for breaking the levee. Had the levee not broke, things would not have been so bad. I'm sure somewhere along the line, somebody knew the levee would not hold, but emergency officials probably had no reason to think it wouldn't.

Like they say, hindsight is 20/20. The city needs to learn from the mistakes of the past, and not repeat them.

What do you think? Hit comments and release your inner Michael Moore.

The Little Dragonfly 

What do you think of...

the use of corsets Sounds painful.
Star Wars, the movie The greatest ever. This tuesday the final DVD comes out. You know I'm gonna be the first dork in line at Best Buy. Overall, Star Wars is a pop culture phenomenon, that changed the movie industry, and it was a big part of my childhood. The special edition of 'Office Space' comes out tuesday as well. I'mma have to get that one too.
the possibility of a bird flu epidemic Get A flu shot and have some Tamiflu ready. I don't think human to human transmission of it is possible, so unless you're the South Park Chicken Lover, You probably will be alright. The poultry industry had a small outbreak in the early 80s, and they put up certain safeguards. Still, better safe than sorry.
actor Kelsey Grammer ('Frasier') I always thoght him and his brother were gay on the show, despite their lusting after the opposite sex. In real life, Grammer has a hot wife.
Horror fiction I dunno, I would have to read a book to form an opinion on that subject, and I can't make that kind of commitment in this post-9/11 world.

1. how did you celebrate hallowe'en as a child? did your mother make your costume, did you go trick-r-treating with friends, etc? My mom would either make me a costume or just go buy me one. I grew out of trick-or-treating fairly early. Mostly because it involved walking, even though it was for candy.

2. what was your best (or most memorable) costume growing up? My mom made me a cool Stormtrooper uniform. It was basically a white shirt and pants with a design drawn on it with a sharpie. I went as Gene Simmons when I was 8, even though I hadn't heard one song by Kiss, I still thought he was cool.

3. a lot of evangelical christians refuse to celebrate hallowe'en because they feel it is "satan's holiday." how do you feel about that? I feel its presumptuous to put an apostrophe in halloween. In the dictionary, there's no apostrophe, and in every place its written you don't see one. How ghey. Anyway, people who think Halloween is satan's holiday are foolish. The holiday is about dressing up and eating candy, and going to a party maybe. Thats it, nothing else. My baby's going as a dragonfly, is she a devil worshipper now? The christians who are against it obviously have not learned the history of the holiday.

The word itself, "Halloween," actually has its origins in the Catholic Church. It comes from a contracted corruption of All Hallows Eve. November 1, "All Hollows Day" (or "All Saints Day"), is a Catholic day of observance in honor of saints. But, in the 5th century BC, in Celtic Ireland, summer officially ended on October 31.

The story goes on to say that you dress up because the souls of those who died the previous year are looking for a body to possess, but they can't find you if you're dressed up. So to all you Christians out there who don't like halloween, LIGHTEN UP, AND EAT SOME CANDY.

4. as an adult, do you ever dress up for hallowe'en? Occasionally. I did last year:

5. do you give out candy every year to trick or treaters, or do you turn off your lights and pretend you're not home? I've lived in apartments up to now, so I usually turn out the lights and pretend I'm not home. One time while living in an apartment, I walked to the dumpster to throw away my trash, and on the way back I noticed some kids were knocking on my door. I waited across the parking lot for 15 minutes just to make sure the coast was clear and I could go back inside. What a dick I beez.
This year I live in suburbia in a house, so we're gonna give out candy, if we don't eat it ourselves first. We carved pumpkins tonight which will be our decoration.

6. let's say you were going to a very exclusive, chi-chi costume party for grown-ups. You had unlimited funds to purchase/rent/make your dream costume. what would you go as? tell us about your perfect costume.
Probably a really really accurate Darth Vader costume with the voice changer and breath sounds thingie. Either that or Britney Spears.
7. what's the best hallowe'en costume you've ever seen, either on the 'net, on TV/movies or in real life? Oprah Winfrey, she's pretty scary.

8. every year, i have to purchase the hallowe'en costumes the day of hallowe'en because mr. laura will eat my candy beforehand. do you have a hard time NOT eating the hallowe'en candy before you give it out? ;) Hell yeah. I put our candy bowl on top of the fridge, but that's kinda useless cuz while you're scoping out whats in the fridge, you just reach up and grab a fun-sized Twix™ brand cookie bar.

So Brave, So... Brave.

We Didn't Start The Fire

monday madness

1. diamonds or pearls? Diamonds. Only Barbara Bush wears pearls.
2. paperback or hardcover books? Whichever has the most pictures.
3. carpet or hardwood floors? I got both in the casa, but I think hardwoods are nice.
4. dogs or cats? I'm not a pet person, but I think dogs have the edge.
5. fluffy or firm pillow? Fluffy
6. fine point or medium point pens? Medium Point. It makes nicer lines.
7. clocks a little fast or on time? A little fast, just cuz I'm lazy.
8. mahjong or spider solitaire (or other)? Neither, I'm not a fag.
9. wall calendar or desk calendar? Both, again cuz I'm lazy.
10. 'Survivor' or 'The Amazing Race?' Neither, I'm not a fag.

1. What fire-related music moment do you think tops them all? Jimi Hendrix lighting his guitar on fire, Keith Moon's drum set exploding, Michael Jackson's jheri curl catching fire during a Pepsi commercial, or Left Eye of TLC setting her boyfriend's house on fire? If you can think of one I didn't list that's even better, let's hear about it! Richard Pryor catching hissef on fire while smoking crack. He then ran down the street on fire. I can just hear that noise that he'd be making!

2. Is there a CD/LP/mp3 in your collection that you'd like to watch burn down to nothing? It could be a current album that you're embarassed to own, or an album you bought in the past that you regret buying. I don't usually buy CDs for this very reason... the last shitty one that I bought was "Ace Of Base." I'm quite embarrased about that.

3. What musical performance, either live or recorded, do you think was so smokin' hot that the fire brigade should have been called? Any by Prince. He'll put anyone else to shame, except for like Hendrix or the Beatles. OH, and here in the "colonies" we call the "fire brigade" a "fire department."

4. Ok this isn't a match question, but sort of related. Have you ever held up a lighter during a concert? If not, would you ever and what band would you do it for? Nah, too cliche. Maybe if I was going to a Skynyrd concert, or a Klan Rally.

Prince Needs A New Hip

I was sad to hear this.

Pop superstar Prince is facing painful hip surgery to help him cope with discomfort brought on by years of performing in high-heeled boots.

The pint-sized When Doves Cry singer is thinking twice about a full hip replacement, according to sources close to him, because, as a Jehovah's Witness he's against the blood transfusion part of the operation.

The 47-year-old star is on medication as he attempts to battle the pain of his bad joints, according to US tabloid National Enquirer.

First of all, I'd take anything from the Enquirer with a grain of salt. Also, it does make sense that years of walking in heels, dancing, etc would take a toll on the brother's hips.

If this is true, I think its ridiculous that he doesn't want blood transfusions. That is retarded. Those religions who will forego medical treatment for religious reasons should be tried for murder. Do they really think that God doesn't want them to live or feel better? How could they sit there and deny their children medical care, even watch their kid die, because the church tells them its the law.

Prince should either wise the hell up, and get the operation or sit out the rest of his life in a wheelchair in pain.

My grandmother always said, "Why buy the cow when you get the sex for free?"

The latest interview with aging hipster Madonna got me thinking. In the interview with "This Is London." She told them she's a stern disciplinarian with her children, and won't even let them watch TV:

"My kids don't watch TV. We have televisions but they're not hooked up to anything but movies. TV is trash. I was raised without it. We don't have magazines or newspapers in the house either."

Apparently that fake accent has gone to her head. Did she forget what got her to the top of the entertainment world? The very trash TV, newspapers and movies she now despises. Now everyone has a right to change their mind, and everyone has a right to raise their kids like they want. But you gotta dance with the one that brung you to the dance, Mo. The Kabbalah's making her mental. Why can't she just be a Scientologist and wait for the aliens to come? What a hypocrite. "I write childrens books, I'm a perfect mother now" Whatever. Wasn't there a picture in your "Sex" book getting d.p.'d by Big Daddy Kane and Vanilla Ice? or something like that. It take much more than an old lady dress and a fake accent to cover up such a phony. And her music sucks these days too. How hard is it to hear a song at a club, then pay a producer to make an identical song and sing over it? She's become the Artist formerly known as relevant. I guess she still has some popularity, I'm writing about her, ain't I?
Look at her contemporaries from the 80s... Prince don't curse any more and is a holy roller, and his songs were considered dirty back in the day. But he still sings "Dance Music Sex Romance" and the like. And look at Michael Jackson, he's just as freaky now as he was back then. You don't see him coming out against wearing one glove and high-waters with sequined socks. And he's stayed true to his backing of men sleeping in beds with young boys.

In other news, I know very little about sports... but I do know what an integral part the New Orleans Saints are to Louisiana and that region. There's talk that the team's temporary home, San Antonio, is trying to keep the Saints there. The team's longtime owner, Tom Benson, has lived there for years. For once I agree with N.O.'s numbskull mayor Ray Nagin, he said, "We want the team back, but we might not want its owner back." I say if someone's gonna kick a city when its down, they deserve that bunch of losers. Its disrespectful to a town that has already gone through so much. New Orleans over the years has bent over backwards for Tom Benson. I remember numerous times growing up that he threatened to move the Saints to a stadium just over the Mississippi state line or to somewhere else. I hope this isn't another ploy to get more money out of the city. When the Saints do get back to the Superdome, its going to be virtually brand new, since the hurricane and the evacuees destroyed it. But hey, what do I know, I don't give a shit about football, I just hate to see another bad thing happen to my hometown.

I'm anxious to check out the 10th anniversary DVD of Mallrats... If I can watch it.

Which one?

1. Lemonade or Iced Tea? Ice Tea, no self-respecting southerner would drink anything else.
2. DVD or VHS? DVD. VHS going the way of 8-Tracks, Mood Rings, and Beta (which was a better format).
3. Gold or Silver? White Gold.
4. Baseball or Tennis? Neither. Both are as boring a watching paint dry.
5. Spring or Autumn? Spring. Autumn sounds like a white trash lady's name.
6. Diet or Regular? Both.
7. Hearts or Stars? Stars
8. Snail Mail or Email? Definately E-mail
9. Shop: Online or In-Store? Online of course.
10. Credit Card or Check? Credit Card.

Question of the Day

If any one of the holidays had to be celebrated twice in a year, which one would you want it to be? Christmas. People take half a day off from being assholes and tolerate their relatives with some modicum of love. And you get presents. And you get to see the Andy Williams Christmas Special.

1. What's your favorite scary movie? Scary book? They make scary books? Any of the Hannibal Lecter Series. Other scary movies like Freddy, Jason, etc are predictable and not scary at all.
2. Who is scarier, Freddy Kruger(nightmare on elm street), Jason(friday the 13th) or Michael Myers(halloween)? Well none of them really. If I had to pick, I'd say Freddy Kruger, cuz he's not really real, so if you kill him, he'd just come back.
3. Do you believe in wherewolves, vampires and or zombies? No. However, I believe in wolves (I've seen them), I believe in people who have severe allergies to the sun (I've seen them on TV), and people who are braindead but still walk around (I know many of them personally).
4. Are you superstitious? Why or why not? A little. Like keeping good luck charms and Karma.
5. Are you afraid of the dark? Nope.
6. Who is your favorite movie monster? Bette Midler.

The Flathead Symphony. Cool.

an experiment in multitasking: updating

an experiment in multitasking: updating the page, feeding abby, all in the middle of big lots.

My useless opinions on...

The art of Pablo Picasso: Cool. Eyes on one side of the face, neat-o.
Health Insurance: Its a necessary evil these days. HMOs get you coming or going. I have some socialized medicine thing. They do everything but stamp a bar-code on your forehead. But I'm glad I have some kind of insurance, even though they can't make me better. "Just get rest, take vitamins." Thanks a lot, Dr. Sawbones.
the year 1937: The year my first wife, Suzanne Pleshette, was born. How great is that year?
Ants: I hate them. They mess with my lawn, they bite you. Spray em Squash em Kill em.
Ballroom Dancing: Good for people born in 1937.
Do you have a preferred writing utensil? What happens if someone borrows it but doesn't bring it back?
Black pens. The secret to getting your pen back is to not give them the cap. People hate pens without caps. Plus people who see that you're not giving them the cap think you don't trust them, and will usually not ask to borrow a pen from you again.

---

This page shows you how you stack up against famous people... heightwise, of course. Because I'm a full foot taller than the late great Nell Carter, but she towers over me when it comes to talent.

I'm sick of it all.

"Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own" Tough, you think you've got the stuff You're telling me and anyone You're hard enough You don't have to put up a fight You don't have to always be right Let me take some of the punches For you tonight Listen to me now I need to let you know You don't have to go it alone And it's you when I look in the mirror And it's you when I don't pick up the phone Sometimes you can't make it on your own We fight all the time You and I...that's alright We're the same soul I don't need...I don't need to hear you say That if we weren't so alike You'd like me a whole lot more Listen to me now I need to let you know You don't have to go it alone And it's you when I look in the mirror And it's you when I don't pick up the phone Sometimes you can't make it on your own I know that we don't talk I'm sick of it all Can - you - hear - me - when - I - Sing, you're the reason I sing You're the reason why the opera is in me... Where are we now? I've still got to let you know A house still doesn't make a home Don't leave me here alone... And it's you when I look in the mirror And it's you that makes it hard to let go Sometimes you can't make it on your own Sometimes you can't make it The best you can do is to fake it Sometimes you can't make it on your own

3 parachutes for the cast of Seinfeld

You've been given 3 parachutes, but there are 4 people who need them. Who will you not give one to: Jerry, Elaine, George, or Kramer?
Elaine's gotta go. Its Jerry's show, you gotta have him. Kramer is hilarious, and would never hurt anyone intentionally... unintentionally sure... but he's the most considerate of the group (which ain't saying much). Costanza has to live, if nothing else because it would make him more miserable. Elaine is a self-centered bitch who never contributed anything to the group... even though that was pretty much her character.

01. Can you remember where you were in life ten years ago? If you could travel back in time and whisper something to yourself ten years ago, what would it be? Ten years ago I was a college student in my senior year, interning at a tv station, learning my trade. Life was beautiful. I partied, I worked hard, I studied hard, I had some great friends, I lived at home, I had very few bills, it was great. There are many nights drinking in Mexico that I can barely remember. As for what I'd whisper to myself, it would probably be winning lottery numbers, Super Bowl winners, and some stock tips.

02. You inherit a large piece of land and decide to build a theme park a la "Disneyland, Sea World, etc.) What would you name your theme park and what would your mascot be? PornLand The mascot would be a cartoon dick with a smiley face on it. Dickey would be his name. His girlfriend, Smelly Pussy, is a cat with a funny lisp. Their neighbor is Dirty Beaver, she's a nosy, yet lovable little lady. Among the attractions: the noon nude parade through Downtown PornLand, "Its a Smut World, after all," where you can sample pornography from around the world (Stay away from Germany, unless you have a strong stomach), The Lesbian Log Ride, and Bukkake Mountain.

04. What would someone absolutely HAVE to know about you if they were considering sharing a room with you? Don't touch my shit.

05. According to the song White Rabbit, "one pill makes you larger and one pill makes you small". If you were offered these pills today, which pill would you take and why? That songs sucks. Jefferson Airplane sucks. Jefferson Starship sucks. Starship sucks. 'We built this city' sucks too.

BeliBlog: Four For Friday Archives

Q: What are four (4) of your favorite words? Fuck, Cumquat, Yes, Queef
Q: What are four (4) things you hope to do this weekend? Sleep, heal this illness, laundry, introduce Abby to vegetables!
Q: What are the four (4) things you say most often? Fuck, Cumquat, Yes, Queef.
Q: What are four (4) things you wish you could do right now? Sleep, heal, stop worrying, run a marathon
Q: What are four (4) things that turn you on? naked ladies... 4 of them.
Q: What are four (4) things you know you can't do? go back in time, fix past mistakes, live up to expectations, sit ups.
Q: What are your four (4) favorite things to do? Play with Abby, Sleep, anything creative, fuck.
Q: What four (4) sounds or noises do you absolutely hate? Bodily excretory noises, ringing phones, SMPTE Tone, other peoples cryin kids (mine never cries ;) )

What I'm gonna wear for Halloween...

Thank God for Target :)

Damn Spammers

If you read the comments, you'll notice that there's spam in there now. So, now you have to type in a verification word if you leave comments. If you hate spam, hit comments and release your inner Federline.

Things I don't give a shit about, but yet they will be plaguing the news for days:

• Britney & Cletus are on the rocks. Good. "Its like I'm raising two kids." Thats just scary.


• Nicky And Jessica are on the rocks. Good. Another two Rocket Scientists.


• "Tom-Kat" is expecting. Great, the psychologists of the world are all simultaneously high-fiving each other.

Question of the Day

"You've been given 3 parachutes, but there are 4 people who need them. Who will you not give one to:
Tom Cruise, Jessica Simpson, Paris Hilton, or Kevin Federline?"
For the good of mankind, I'd throw out the parachutes with no one in them.

---

There are some points in my life when I think "what else can life throw at me?" then I think of those who inspire me, and I think, "Bring it on." Like my Dad says, You can't keep a good man down.

Separated At Birth?

Zoë & Abby

Zoë reading to Abby. Aren't they the cutest? Taken Sept. 25, 2005 at my house. Click for a bigger version.

Saturday Night Dead

2. How many photos that you have taken yourself are hanging on display in your home in a size of 8x10 or larger? (The print, not the frame!) None that are 8x10... but there are a few of Abby that I took that are framed, but 4x6. She really is photogenic... :)

3. How far do you live from your job? What is your commute time like? Has the distance prompted you to consider alternative transportation because of gas prices? 38 miles. >:( My commute time is usually 38 minutes because I speed, and at 3am, ain't nobody in the way. I would definately take public transportation if it was available, but MARTA don't reach the sticks where I beez.

4. Take this quiz: What decade does your personality live in?



what decade does your personality live in?

quiz brought to you by lady interference, ltd


5. What is the funniest, most original Halloween costume you've ever seen?
I dressed up as a nightstand and put a lamp shade on my head and dubbed myself the "One Night Stand." Top That!

6. What is your favorite paragraph in a literary work? This might be a thought, or a message, or a descriptive passage which has remained in your consciousness throughout the years. Be sure to post the name of the book and author.

Ezekiel 25:17. 'The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyrannies of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepards the weak through the valley of darkness. For he is truly his brothers' keeper and finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the lord when I lay my vengeance upon you.'

Feel The Funk Friday

1. What is the most important thing you've ever lost? Money
2. When is the last time you lost your keys? Never... I'm too worried about being stranded somewhere.
3. Have you ever felt like you've lost your mind? Every damn day.
4. Are you likely to ask for directions when lost or to continue to wander? I ask for directions, I'm too impatient to just keep wandering. But I usually try to have the directions and a number to call if I'm going somewhere unfamiliar.
5. Numerology: reliable or just a load of bunk? Load of Bunk.

---

Appetizer
Name something someone has done lately that impressed you. Everything Abby does amazes me.
Soup
Do you have any relaxing rituals? If so, what are they? I'm tired all day long so as soon as I lay down, I'm out.
Salad
If you could spend the winter season somewhere other than your current location, where would you choose to stay? Anywhere warm. Even if its here in ATL.
Main Course
When was the last time you had dinner out, and what was the name of the restaurant? The hillbilly BBQ place near my house.
Dessert
If you had a boat, what would you name it? The HMS Shagalot.

---

1. What kind of computer do you have? (Mac, iBook, Dell, etc.) Homemade... I roll my own, yo.
2. How old is it? Are you happy with it? I continually update it, and I started building my "perfect" machine in 1993, so its technically 12 years old, but has no old pieces in it.
3. How many computers are in your household? Just one.
4. What are your favorite games/timewasters on your computer? THIS WEBSITE!!
5. If money were no object, what kind of computer would you like to have? Not really anything special, just a new updated/faster one every year.

Question of the Day

"You've been asked to make a major change to any sporting game, in order to make it more interesting. You can change anything about it, the rules, the playing surface, the makeup of the teams, whatever you want, but it can only be one change. What game are you changing, and what will the change be?"

Girls beach volleyball... I'd enforce mandatory nudity.

What about you? Hit comments and release your inner Howard Cosell.

Useless Celebrities!

This paper rocked the top 10 useless celebs. I have to agree with them whole heartedly.

Do you agree? Hit comments and add your own celebs... release your inner Mary Hart.

Hurricane Rita could shit on New Orleans, even without a direct hit. God help those people. I wish they had a better group of people in charge there. Mayor Ray Nagin is like a retarded chimp. There's no water or 911 or electricity... lets let in 480,000 people. Can you say riot? The military guys seem to know what they're doing. The politicians are messing it up.

Paul McCartney live at Philips Arena last night was great. The guy can still rock at 63. I think it was funny how after about 3 minutes into each song, all the old farts in the audience had to sit down... those hip replacements can give out at any second. :) And then when Paul played one of his new songs, people make a beeline to the terlet or the beer stand. He did one of my favorite of his songs:

For No One Your day breaks, your mind aches You find that all the words of kindness linger on When she no longer needs you She wakes up, she makes up She takes her time and doesn’t feel she has to hurry She no longer needs you And in her eyes you see nothing No sign of love behind the tears Cried for no one A love that should have lasted years! You want her, you need her And yet you don’t believe her when she said her love is dead You think she needs you And in her eyes you see nothing No sign of love behind the tears Cried for no one A love that should have lasted years! You stay home, she goes out She says that long ago she knew someone but now he’s gone She doesn’t need him Your day breaks, your mind aches There will be time when all the things she said will fil your head You won’t forget her And in her eyes you see nothing No sign of love behind the tears Cried for no one A love that should have lasted years!

One cool technical note. If you use Firefox, instead of hitting "Add Bookmark" to bookmark this page... hit that little icon in the lower right corner of the browser, and hit add bookmark there. What does that do? It puts the last few posts in a drop-down menu in your Bookmark pull-down menu. What does that mean? You can see if I have a new post without having to wait load up the page. If there is a new post, you can go straight to it. How retarded am I that I just discovered RSS feeds?

Blogthings - Could You Pass the US Citizenship Test?

You Passed the US Citizenship Test

Congratulations - you got 10 out of 10 correct!

Could You Pass the US Citizenship Test?

I knew I would. I'm a friggin genius. take the test and release your inner George Washgington.

VH1.com : Shows : 50 Most Awesomely Bad Songs...Ever : Countdown

Thought this was cool. I can hum most of these, unfortunately

Terra Cotta

Q1: Would you be willing to cut off all communication with everyone in your immediate family for one year if it meant by doing so you'd be saving the lives of 10 innocent people whom you do not know? If your answer is no, what if the scenario changed, and instead of 10 people, your action would save the lives of 100 of 1,000 complete strangers? Sure. My family would understand.

Q2: How often do you wash your hair? Every morning.

Q3: Last night, in a nationally-televised address carried by all four major television networks here in the U.S., President George W. Bush promised a massive federal effort aimed at rebuilding the lives, levees, and communities along Louisiana's, Mississippi's, and Alabama's Gulf Coast. In your opinion, should the city of New Orleans be rebuilt in its current location? Aw Hell yeah. The city isn't all the way gone. Many parts weren't damaged. New Orleans somewhere else wouldn't be New Orleans. It would be Orleansville or something like that. But that won't ever happen. The soul of New Orleans is firmly planted between Lake Ponchatrain and the Mississippi River... and nothing can ever change that.

Q4: What, if anything, is on the outside of your refrigerator? Places to eat Eggs Benedict, and a picture of the dining room set I want.

Appetizer
Do your closer friends tend to be male or female? Why do you think that is? Female, easier on the eyes.

Soup
If you could wake up tomorrow with a new talent, what would it be? Guitar God!

Salad
Name a household cleaning item that you would recommend to others. Green Pads. They'll clean anything. Especially on those heavy days...

Main Course
What do you strive for in life? Just to make it 'til tomorrow.

Dessert
On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being highest, how funny do you consider yourself? 15! boom-boom-boom... Is this thing on?

Top Five Questioning Songs (As always I give you the option of using songs with the word Question in the title or songs that ask questions...it's your choice)
a) Would I lie to you?
b) How does it feel? To be on your own? Like a complete unknown? Like a Rolling Stone.
c) Who'll Stop The Rain?
d) Whats New Pussycat?
e) Can't you smell that smell?

From this week's edition of DUH magazine: females are more likely to have bisexual experiences than men. Those of you who do, send me the pics.

Workin' At The Car Wash

• J.Lo's Bodyguards beat up Paul McCartney's one-legged wife, and stole her
  prosthetic leg. Maybe I'm Amazed...
  
• Renee Zellwigger is splitting with that country dude. He thought she was the character from Jerry Maguire. She thought he could distinguish reality from a movie. Maybe she didn't like the taste of Skoal.
  
• I'm posting via email. does it work?
  
• I don't remember french toast sticks. Maybe someone else?

Tomorrow Never Knows

Thinking about the hurricane and all the death and destruction gets me down. Things are starting to turnaround there. Now everyones blaming everyone else. I think everyone in government, from the president,, down to that idiot cunt governor who looked like a deer in the headlights, to the mayor of New Orleans... who just assumed everything would be alright, then started screaming about what the state is entitled to. How sad. Its the whole mentality of entitlement that the city government has cultivated for the last 50 years. Lets just sit around, somebody'll do something for us. Look what it got them. Sure, they were poor and couldn't go anywhere, but there was plenty of warning to get out. They could scrape together $25 to buy a bus ticket. I guess I just have a different mentality.

I think about what I would do in that situation, and the answer is simple... JUST LEAVE AND DON'T COME BACK. I have enough family and friends around the south I'm sure I could crash on somebody's couch.

But it makes me wonder about all my memories being lost if my house got wiped out. Then I realize... those things can be replaced, and no flood can take away my memories. But it just gets you thinking about things you'd miss and things you miss already... like bleu cheese, pizza and orange county... and my moment of zen.

Today's moment of zen happened last week. I hate answering the phone at work, because its always a nut telling me their stupid story idea. So I've got a bad cold, I'm hopped up on dayquil, its 7am and I'd been at work since 3am, and the phones are ringing off the hook. So I pick up the phone. Sure enough, its a crazy bitch telling me about how dfacs took her kid because her infant was sick and how her midwife told her that e-coli in her vagina made her kid sick. So me, in my sickened state has to hear about this woman's putrid twat making giving her kid food poisoning. I wanted to tell her to hose out her snatch and call someone who gives a shit. Fuck it.

1.Do you ever just take a couple of days and go radio silent from the world? Why/why not? My whole life is radio silent. People need to check in to make sure I'm still living.
2. Do you ever make it a point to get outside your everyday life? What do you do? Where do you go? No. I'm busting my ass to make a living, when do I have time to go outside my everyday life?
3. Do you like it when people can't get ahold of you? How does it make you feel? Nah, I like hearing from people. Like old friends...
Bonus Question for Comments: Do you have any current plans to get away? If so, what are they? Maybe for Christmas...

Uggh, its been a long week, and its just half over.

Fat Dynamite.

Britney Spears has a kid now. Preston Michael Spears Federline. or "PMS" as they call him. How sad is it that I'll know how old britneys kid is, because he's the same age as my kid.

Where's Neve Campbell?

Take the quiz: "Which Horror Movie Are You?"

The Craft
You're whole life, you've felt different. You know you're different, and that is why you break away from the norm and don't give a shit what other people think about you. You're you, you're proud, you're a bit... weird might I say? but you're far more interesting than most people will ever percieve. Keep being yourself, whether people like it or not.

The Music Memoirs

1. Name three songs with anything fire related in the title.
a) Let Me Stand Next To Your Fire... Jimi Hendrix.
b) Fire... Bruce Springsteen/The Pointer Sisters
c) C'mon Baby Light My Fire... The Doors
d) Ring Of Fire... Johnny Cash
e) Burn, Baby, Burn... Disco Inferno... Random Disco Group
2. Name three artists with anything fire related in their name.
Earth, Wind & Fire
REO Speedwagon (its an old fire engine)
After The Fire (a random 80s group)
3. Name three albums with anything fire related in the name.
damn, no idea.
St. Elmo's Fire soundtrack album?? :)

---

Would you rather:
1. lapse into epileptic seizures everytime somebody says the word "squid" OR cluck like a chicken everytime somebody says "chicken"?
Epileptic Squids
2. have no bones, but complete muscular control of every part of your body OR four arms?
Four Arms.
3. your nose hair grow down past your chin no matter how much you cut it OR have earlobes twice the normal size?
Big Earlobes, more earrings
4. have people constantly mistake your sex (man v. woman) OR your sexual preference (straight v. gay)?
my sexual preference, I don't care if people think i'm gay, I know what I like!

Nature's Wrath

I don't know who to be pissed at.

My family and friends in N.O. made it out of the city safely. My heart breaks when I think about what they're going to find when they're able to return. The important thing is that objects can be replaced but people can't. Despite that, the road to rebuilding is a long and hard one... and paved with questions like, "Why did this happen?"

I grieve for the city itself. The roads on which I learned to drive are now rivers. The grounds on which I stomped are now under water. The landmarks that made me feel at home are gone. All my little moments and memories, washed away. The Esplanade Mall and the movie theaters where we spent our teenage years... Uncle Al's shop where we would watch the parades... the stoop in the French Quarter on which I puked many times... Those mechanical legs popping out of "Big Daddy's Topless Bottomless Club"... The great po-boys at 'Come Back Inn'... What will I show my little girl when I take her to New Orleans?

If any good can come from this situation, it would be that New Orleans will be rebuilt stronger. Much of the city was old and decrepit. It was a testament to the city's heritage. Those testaments may be gone, but that heritage will never be lost. I can only hope that the architects of New Orleans 2.0 will keep in mind the mistakes of the past, to prevent the need for a New Orleans 3.0. New Orleanians, unlike folks in other big cities, have a reluctance when it comes to change. The mentality is: things in the Crescent City have been one way for many many years, its worked, so why change it. I hope that doesn't become a hindrance when its time to move the city forward.

I still don't know who to be pissed at.

My City Of Ruins

There’s a blood red circle
On the cold dark ground
And the rain is falling down
The church doors blown open
I can hear the organ’s song
But the congregation’s gone

My city of ruins
My city of ruins

Now the sweet veils of mercy
Drift through the evening trees
Young men on the corner
Like scattered leaves
The boarded up windows
The hustlers and thieves
While my brother’s down on his knees

My city of ruins
My city of ruins

Come on rise up!
Come on rise up!

Now there’s tears on the pillow
Darling where we slept
And you took my heart when you left
Without your sweet kiss
My soul is lost, my friend
Now tell me how do I begin again?

My city’s in ruins
My city’s in ruins

Now with these hands
I pray lord
With these hands
For the strength lord
With these hands
For the faith lord
With these hands
I pray lord
With these hands
For the strength lord
With these hands
For the faith lord
With these hands

Come on rise up!
Come on rise up!
Rise up

Please Pray For New Orleans

I miss the old Pope.

Whats up doc?

Bugs Bunny! You scored 42 Aggression, 85 Sophistication, and 71 Optimism!

You have all the sophistication and charm one would expect from such a high-class hare. Very upbeat and generally laid-back, you are remarkably calm and peaceful even in the midst of the most stressful of situations. On those rare occasions that your anger is aroused, your retaliation usually results in embarrassing the aggressor and laying-bare how foolish he or she really is -- rather than doing any real harm. You likely have many friends and more than a few admirers and would make an excellent leader, if you had any interest in being one. But, being a leader would require hard work and attention to detail, both qualities you are lacking in. In fact, if you are not careful, your laid-back attitude will often lead you to drift through life completely oblivious to the changes happening around you. You also tend to have a horrible sense of direction.

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 24% on Aggression You scored higher than 80% on Sophistication You scored higher than 65% on Optimism

Link: The Which Looney Tune Are You Test written by coolguy3000 on Ok Cupid

Saturday8

tell us what creeps you out....

1. animal Spiders and Snakes.
2. book ScatLover Magazine
3. film Silence Of The Lambs (It puts the lotion on its skin!)
4. family member Ha! He's six-feet under, good for him.
5. co-worker Most of the engineers at channel 46
6. food Cheeses that smell like feet mixed with rotten crotch
7. computer-related game, software, image, operating system, hardware bit, video, etc. Macs
8. culture or cultural practise Blowing up buildings in the name of a religion

Slave 2 The System... before I was born... Slave 2 The Master... Beat Me til I'm Worn

01. If your brain were scratch and sniff, what smell might we be sniffing when we scratched? Quesadillas.
02. 'There was an old lady who lived in a shoe ...' If you lived in a shoe, what kind of shoe would it be? Moccasin... kinda tight and constricting at first, but then becomes a part of you.
03. What the last thing that made you laugh so hard you spit out whatever you were drinking? "A Pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants, and orders a drink. A few drinks later, the bartender says, "I gotta ask, whats with steering wheel in your pants?" Pirate replies, "I dunno, but its driving me nuts."
04. If you were an 'As Seen On TV' product what would your function be and what cheesy name would you have? a special box for your TV that hunts out shows with the "TV M" or "R" ratings. It'll be covered in fabric, or fur to match any decor. And you have to buy it from the Momus A. Morgus Institute. The name? "Your M.A.M.I.'s Hairy, Dirty Box™." Anyone who is up on technology would have "Your M.A.M.I.'s Hairy Dirty Box™" in their home. Need A last minute Christmas or Chanukah gift? Why not let your loved ones have "Your M.A.M.I.'s Hairy Dirty Box™"?!
05. A doctor is giving you a complete physical exam and says, 'That's odd'. What has the doctor found? "Your M.A.M.I.'s Hairy Dirty Box™"
06. What would you wear for camouflage if you were hiding in a gingerbread house?" Some gingerbread drawz and an icing shirt.

The Idiot Box

1. What do you watch most? Unfortunately news. Definately not the gotdam reality shows.
2. What would you be embarassed to be caught watching even though you do watch it? The O.C.
3. Write yourself into a tv show. "Tonight, on WKRP In Cinncinnati... Dr. Johnny Fever hires a new producer, some fat kid from Atlanta, to pick his records. But the good doctor gets jealous when the new kid becomes more popular... and he does whatever he can to get him fired!"
4. Replace someone in a tv show. "This week on Sanford And Son, Fred becomes cross at Lamont (now played by Chas) after he brings home a white woman. Hilarity ensues when Fred comes up with a scheme to break them up!"
5. Who would you like to see out of tvland forever? Oprah.
6. Who would you like to see back? The fucking Sopranos.
7. Entertainment or information? Entertainment. I'm bombarded by information all day long.
8. What makes for a good viewing experience for you? Cursing and nudity.
9. Have you ever had a great idea for a special niche cable channel (like the Golf Channel or Home and Garden TV)? an MTV that actually shows videos.
10. What was your favorite show when you were a kid? I spent my entire young life sitting in front of the TV, so to narrow it down to one, would be impossible.
11. Most memorable moment of television? The first time I watched MTV, back in 1981. My mom had to go get the converter box from the bedroom so I could watch it, cause they put it at the bottom of the cable line-up.
12. Most memorable moment you'd just as soon forget? 9/11.
13. What would you like to see again? With vcrs, tivo, etc, you can see anything over and over again.

i knew it!

What would you do in the following situations?

1. The store clerk undercharges you for an item you purchase? Consider myself lucky and move on.
2. The cashier gives you change for a fifty dollar bill when you only gave her a twenty, and you don't realize it until you're out the door? Keep on truckin'! I'm sure this makes me a bad person, but I've been ripped off, its just karma... evening things out.
3. You see your best friend's husband/wife with another woman/man at a neighborhood restaurant? Its ain't my business... keep your mouth shut. Why make someone else's life even more miserable?
4. Your 15 year old asks you if you ever tried an alcoholic beverage before you were of legal drinking age (and you have)? Be honest. If my daughter wants to try alcohol, it will be with me supervising, and it won't be before she's driving, etc. If you keep things from kids, they just want it more.
5. You find a one hundred dollar bill laying on the floor of a department store? I probably wouldn't pick it up. Like Dante said in clerks, people by nature are suspicous, they see money lying around they figure they're being watched. Honesty by paranoia.

01. We all have our own interpretation of cool. What single artist do you think is the King or Queen of Cool and why? Morris Day. He's even got a song about how he's C-O-O-L.

02. What artist(s) or song(s) leaves you COLD ... is there a reason why? I dunno. You guys suggest some.

03. What artist(s), band(s), song title(s) or lyrics come to mind which involve one or all of the following words? cold, cool, ice "In the air tonight," "Frozen," "Ice Ice Baby" hehehe

Whiny people piss me off... two examples:
The rich bastards in Sandy Springs. These assholes have been whining about becoming their own city for years and years. Mostly because they didn't want their precious tax dollars to go to the "darkies" in the dirty south part of Fulton County. So now they're a city, and they're gonna bitch that the county doesn't want to let them use their police and firefighters. Shouldn't they have thought about that during the previous 30 fucking years? So now, those pompous asses are shitting on the Ronald McDonald House. The charity wants to expand its "house" by adding 50-beds. That 50-more parents who don't have to go to a hotel when their children are in the hospital being treated for serious diseases. But God forbid they encroach on those tight-asses homes. I hope they come face to face with an ill child and explain why they don't want their parents in their neighborhood. They should pray like monks that none of *their* kids get sick. I think the Ronald McDonald House should change its name to the "Fuck Sandy Springs House."

Another bunch of whiny bitches: The Airline Industry. First they cry like bitches to the government all the time that they're going out of business because nobody's flying after 911. The government bails them out, which is wrong... they should adapt to the marketplace. Supply and Demand its called. So then, when passenger numbers get back to "pre-911 levels," they start bitching about fuel prices and how they're going to have to pass the prices along to travellers. Wah-Wah. Thats life. Again, supply and demand. People don't want to fly your overpriced airline, drop prices, or give them something more for their money. Now comes the icing on the cake. These whiney fucks are bitching because in the President's new energy bill, he has us starting daylight saving time 3 weeks earlier, and ending it a week later. This will save the country millions of dollars, because people will be turning on their lights later, and not using as much electricity. Plus people will shop longer and will go out to eat more if the sun is out. That helps our economy right? People with more money and more opportunities to spend it. Who wouldn't love that? The airlines. Thats who. These rotten fucks say that it will throw off their international schedules and passengers will be waiting for hours. Wah-Wah. Tough shit. Change your fucking schedules, you got more than a year to deal with this. Bottom line is, most businesses live and die by delivering a product at a price and manner in which people like. Thats why Coke, McDonalds, UPS, and GE are successful. So why does the airline industry believe it does not have to hold itself to that same standard?

Onanii

A number of quick thoughts today:

• I get a mini-vacation tomorrow. Time to let the relatives fawn all over the baby.
  
• Happy Diddling Day!
  
• Jude Law in trouble for doing it with his hot Nanny. Ya know why? Cuz he can. He's Jude Law. I always thought he was half-a-fag. Guess I was wrong.
  
• Colin Farrell pissed cuz his Playboy Playmate Girlfriend wanted to sell the sex tape they made. If you were a pretty boy like Farrell, and had a playmate girlfriend, wouldn't you be showing that shit to all your friends? Him and Jude Law are pretty boy fruits who need some bad press.
  
• Telemarketers want loopholes in the 'Do Not Call' list. Screw them. Telemarketers are a cunthair higher on the food chain than child pornographers. I don't understand how these fuckers can get up and look at themselves in the mirror.
  
• The government slams spammers who send porno emails. Good. Spammers are a cunthair higher on the food chain than Telemarketers.
  
• The video game GTA: San Andreas pulled off the shelf because it has a sexually explicit scene. Imagine that. Now Best Buy and several other stores are taking it off the shelf. But yet they keep thousands of other movies with much worse. What do parents think the video game is about? Its about doing crime and stuff. Attention Parents: do your fucking job, monitor what your kids are doing, and quit ruining it for the rest of us.
  
  

The Aristocrats, Part Deaux

A few weeks ago, I ran across a funny South Park clip and posted a link to it. It was Cartman telling the most disgusting joke ever... and I mean EVER. Apparently the jokes been around for years, and has been evolving, and has taken on a life of its own. In fact now, they're making a movie about it called, what else, The Aristocrats. Its got the top comedians telling the joke and talking about it. The movie probably won't get played anywhere around here, but when it comes on video, I'm sho nuff gonna rent it.

Saturday Night's alright for fighting.

1. how many languages do you speak? Dos, Inglés y Español


2. do/did your parents speak more than one language? Nope, just english.

3. i live in florida, and we have many spanish-only signs/billboards, and it is beneficial to learn spanish. would you learn another language if there was a strong minority presence in your community? Thats partially why I learned Spanish. I lived 8 miles from the Mexican border in McAllen, TX. at least 90% of the population is hispanic. Therefore, you learn spanish or you get talked about and made fun of, right in front of your face. I was working at my Dad's restaurant, and the salad bar ladies did that to me all the time. I let it go, and just gave them the evil eye (good in any language). Meanwhile I was taking Spanish in college, and being that close to Mexico, I was immersed in it, so I picked it up quick. One day, I heard them talking about me, I understood what they were saying, and I just joined in on the conversation. The look on their faces was priceless.

Here in Atlanta, there are sooo many different cultures, that a second language is always helpful. There are schools where 100+ languages are spoken as either a student's first or second language. Despite that, hispanics are the dominant minority, so Spanish is definatley helpful here.

4. many state, federal and local legal forms are available in other languages. my children's school forms are always presented in english, spanish, and haitian creole, and it makes for a lot of money spent on printing for my daughter's school district. do you think that these should ONLY be an english? It depends on the community in which the school is. In your area, those 3 languages are most helpful. In New Haven, Connecticut, it may be OK to just print stuff in english. There are some who will say, "They've come to our country, they should learn our language." Well, english is not, nor will it ever be the "official" language of the United States. And there are many many people who were born here in the U.S. and are just as American as anyone else, but they don't speak english because their parents are immigrants. And what about the people who become citizens, they sometimes don't speak very much english, why should they have to miss out on something.

5. due to the U.S.' being so removed from other languages (as opposed to western europe), we are mainly monolingual (speaking only one language). do you think that there should be a push for americans becoming more multi-lingual, or are we o.k. with knowing just one language? Not until its a hindrance to only speak one language. And that won't happen for many many years.

6. a big controversy has been with 'ebonics,' a term for 'black english.' some people think it's a language, others think it's a dialect of english. ultimately, people who speak 'black english' are usually discriminated against in getting jobs and also housing. do you think that black americans should conform and speak 'standard american english' to get better jobs and housing? why or why not? Ebonics is a word that someone created. Its not a language, or a dialect. Yes, in this country, a dialect in addition to your skin color will get you discriminated against. But you can't change your skin color. You can change how you talk. Unlike those who speak with an hispanic accent, ebonics is an indication of your intelligence. You know the right way to speak, but you choose not to, whether by laziness or societal pressure. How many college professors do you know speak ebonics? How many Rhodes scolars speak in ebonics?

7. i love french ... i speak it, i read it, i watch a huge amount of french cinema. it's very expressive and melodic. what's your favourite language - either to speak, or to listen to? why? Italian, because it reminds me of my relatives and gangstas.

8. i hate listening to german and arabic - i love the people, BUT i find german sounds halting and gutteral, and arabic is so 'throaty' that it just doesn't seem feminine to me. what language do you dislike listening to OR speaking? I agree with those two. When I hear German, I either picture Hitler barking order to the Nazis, or Siegfried and Roy or Mike Myers "Dieter" character. I know those are terrible stereotypes, but I'm a terrible person and thats what the german language sounds like to me. As for Arabic, whenever I hear it I think of terrorists or the guy who runs the Kwik-E-Mart. I expect them to end the conversation with, "Sank you, come again."
What are your thoughts? Hit the comments and release your inner Siegfried and Roy.

Cool Helpful Astounding Sarcasm

I have the weekend off for the first time in forever. Its nice not having to get up for work in the middle of the night! Thanks WSB! jeez. As I listen to Abby coo in the other room, I figure I would spew my wisDUMB upon youz. Enjoy! Remember, you guys get the Employee Discount. You pay what we pay for this web page!

1. What is the last thing you either camped out or got up unusually early to be able to buy? like those kids did with the Harry Potter books? sheeeit not me, man. Not even for concert tickets. I get my Prince tickets a day ahead of time, and its via the net. I did wait in line once for like 3 hours to buy Prince tickets, but that was only because they weren't on sale on the internet (The Tabernacle hadn't come that far at that time). But there's no event I'd camp out for. Case in point: the idiots who waited months in line to see Star Wars... It's the EXACT same movie I saw 10 hours later than the superfans... except I bought my tickets online, and I just walked my happy ass into the theater, sat down and watched. No Fuss No Muss. I understand part of it is the community aspect. Camping out for college football playoff tickets would probably be a blast, but it would be more for the experience than the tickets.

2. If you had to give up one of the following for a full year, which would be the easiest to do without? Which would be the most difficult to give up?
a) Your personal vehicle Most difficult. A car is not a luxury, its a means to get to work to make a living. Plus I would hate to have to bum rides all the time. I always feel like a douchebag when I have to do that. Unless I lived close to a marta station or something, I'd find a way to have a ride to work.
b) Your Telephone (both cellular and land line) Easily given up. Nobody calls me. My cell phone is a toy mostly.
c) The Internet A few years ago, I would've said this would be the hardest thing to give up. At one point a former girlfriend called my computer, "The Other Woman." But I know much better now. I now only play online when I'm bored, and I just check my email. There are so many more important things in life. That being said, I if I do have internet, Its gonna be high-speed. I just can't do dial-up. Its cable or nothing. Also, I couldn't give up the internet at work, its become a valuable tool for newsgathering.
d) Meat (all of it: Beef, Poultry, Pork and Seafood) Semi-hard to give up. I'm one of those people who think a meal has to have a meat for it to be a real meal. But I could live without it if I had to.
e) Television
Same as the internet, useful at work, but I know I could live without it when I'm not at work. I pay for the badass cable package that has every movie channel for every niche (like that Black Lesbian Southern Movie Channel), but I don't hardly watch it at all. So I'm sure I could live without it.

4. What is the first source you go to for news of any kind when you wake up? How much do you trust that particular source? The AJC and Drudge when I'm online. CNN if I'm watching TV. I trust ajc & cnn. Drudge I definately take with a grain of salt. I don't trust Fox news for shit. Blatant right-wing bias.

5. Take the Quiz: What do the letters of your name stand for?

C	Cool
H	Helpful
A	Astounding
S	Sensitive

Name:

6. What is your favorite color and why? If you have a journal or journals, is this color the primary one on those journals? If not, why not?" Black & White, cuz I'm colorblind. Yes, the color theme here is black & white.

Your turn, put your name in that name acronym thingie and tell me what it says. Answer the questions. Release your inner P.A.G.A.N. (People Against Goodness and Normalcy. Name the movie its from! Can't huh?)

Proper Modulation

As you know, its been a while since I've posted. Between work, baby & house, I have no time to do shit. I work shitty hours... I'm always tired. Just like Jack Nicholson... somethings gotta give.

So for those of you who want to read on... here's more shiznit:
The Pope Hates Harry Potter: But yet he has no problem with priests molesting kids. Kids weren't reading anything... and they sure as hell weren't standing in line to buy books before Harry Potter came along. Anything that gets kids reading and not sitting on their ass in front of the TV or computer (like I'm doing now) has to be good. "God's Enforcer" should focus his attention on more important things than kids reading.

Brad Pitt Has Viral Meningitis. Tough shit. Welcome to the real world.
TomKat: Why can't these two get viral meningitis? I can't wait until the beard falls off and he's exposed for the fraud he is.

Mariah Carey Blames 9/11 for the failure of her movie 'Glitter.' Uhh sure... The shitty acting and stupid story had nothing to do with it. Here's an indication of your tanking movie and singing career... Your tits flew out in the middle of a concert... and nobody cared.

Thats it for now. Check out the pics in the flickr.

Abby & Elmo

Changes In Latitudes, Changes In Attitudes

I should post more often.... I just have a thousand other things to do first. Send me an email telling me how much I suck. :) My eyes are getting heavy... time for bed.

3x Thursday

1. Have you ever been camping? If yes, do you go often? If not, why not?
Kinda sorta. I went to a cabin in the mountains. It had heat and a kitchen and cable. :) Thats as rough as I like to get it.
2. Are you an outdoorsy person, or would you rather stay inside the comfort of your house? Why?
Sheeit. I want to stay in the comfort of my house.
3. Which do you prefer, hot weather or cold weather? Why/why not? How do you cope with each?
Hot Weather! I hate the cold. I stay inside when its cold outside. Come to think of it... i stay inside when its hot. Except when its grass mowing day.
Bonus Question for Comments: What are you doing this 4th of July weekend?
Work. 3 11pm shows over the 3 day weekend.

I'm baaack

Its been a long ass time since I've posted anything. I've moved into my new house, so that took much time, and I didn't have the net in the interim. That, on top of playing with the baby, who teaches me things every day. You can see pictures of her in the flickr to the right.

Drop me an email or something, bitches.

She really didn't want to take this picture. Better ones to come. Keep your eye on the flickr.  

Happy Birthday, Abby Lane!

7 lbs, 10 oz, 20 in.

Pix and details to come!!

I Want My MTV

Who are the first Mtv VJs that you can remember? I remember the first ones. Martha Quinn, Mark Goodman, Alan Hunter, Nina Blackwell, and JJ Jackson (r.i.p.). I wasted so much of my youth watching them!

Name 3 tv shows that aired on Mtv. (were any of them actually music related?) The 3 best:
1. Yo! MTV Raps The greatest of all MTV shows. This show is often overlooked as being a major part of the rap revolution. Before Yo!, there was no rap on TV. Where would white kids see rap videos before YO!? It took rap out of the hood, and put it in the suburbs. Fab 5 Freddy, Dr. Dre (the fat one, not the former NWA one), and Ed Lover kicked ass.
2. Remote Control This was a great pop-culture game show. Adam Sandler, Colin Quinn & Kari Wuhrer got their starts on the show. I remember as a kid I knew all the answers, and hoped to one day sit in the recliner... and you get pelted with cereal if you get a question wrong. It rocked.
3. The Osbournes It turned Ozzy from Metal God to America's favorite dad. And it transformed his mental family into celebs as well. Yes, it jumped the shark fairly quick, but Ozzy still rules.


What bands do you think would be nothing without Mtv? Are you kidding? Any pop group that had a top 10 single after 1984!!! Case in point, before MTV, the hot groups were The Eagles, Christopher Cross and Grand Funk Railroad. The only place you would see what your favorite singer looked like was on the album cover, in concert, and sometimes in concerrt. Then when you actually had to look at the guys, they looked like regular schlubs (like me). Then MTV came along with the cool haircuts, the badass clothes, and just an image no one had seen before. Do you think Duran Duran would be anything without a video? Hell no.

Bonus: What is your favorite music video? Smack My Bitch Up by Prodigy. I've never sat in front of a video with my mouth agape, then that surprise ending! Somehow everyone should see it, then you'll see why I like it!