Friday Night

• James Brown has prostate cancer. James said his first sympton was a cold sweat. He expects to beat it and feel good soon.
  
• The trailer for "Charlie And The Chocolate Factory" is out. I hate it. Willy Wonka looks queer as fuck. Since its not called "Willy Wonka ..." its technically not a remake of the Gene Wilder flick. Thats the only good thing about this flick. Its fucking edwards scissorhands with chocolate. I'm boycotting this blasphemous hunk of shit.
  
• Do the terrorists get their ideas from Dr. Evil? The government says the terrorists may use "lasers" to blind pilots when they're trying to land. What the hell? Next they're going to steal nuclear warheads to drill into the earth and hit liquid hot "MAGMA." Surely this is a joke. Is Osama bin Laden really gonna be sitting on side of Hartsfield-Jackson-Franklin International Airport with a laser pointer taking out AirTran flights full of tourists? I'm sure our airport security could twart a retarded plot like this. I think someone made a joke, and a reporter overheard it, and then ran with it.